Importance of age-mate relations for a personality development and the relations difficulties

Abstract

Recent researches show that age-mates are an important agent, not only for personality socializing but also for personality development in general. Age-mate relations are unique because they are characterized by equality (that we cannot find in a parent-child or a teacher-child relation) and reciprocity (an individual is influenced by its age-mates and vice versa). Age-mate relations change according to age function and an individual’s development. An interest for another children starts at the age of six months when babies watch, coo, and touch each other. But only at the age of three or four they start making friendships. At the preschool period, from two to five, they build up age-mate relations. Only when they are five or six, they like to play with their age-mates without division of labor that would be directed to a common goal (unifying game), or to play in a group that was formed for doing some activity or achieving some goal, with coordinated steps (cooperation game). In their mid-childhood they form groups. The groups are naturally formed by children that live near or go to school together. Adolescence is a period when age-mates have even greater influence because by spending their time with age –mates they achieve their interests. On the other hand age-mates influence interests, attitudes and values of the youth. Characteristics that make a child desirable or undesirable to another child are similar to those that children hope their friend would have. Children prefer pro-social children who like to play with their age-mates, who smile and offer their toy or help. They reject aggressive children, and they ignore withdrawn and shy children. Desirable preschool children cope well with their anger. They answer directly minimizing further conflicts and keeping up a relationship.

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